ceremony

6. It is completely legal for anyone to keep a body at home after death

This is TRUE. It’s clearly not for everyone and, in some circumstances may not be possible but, certainly for a short amount of time there may be many benefits that can really help some with the acceptance and grieving process.  It may be just that you want to keep them at home for a short time to wash and dress them before you hand them over to the care of a funeral director.

You could also look at speaking with a soul midwife or death doula to find out what would be involved in keeping your loved one at home for more than 1-2 days. There are none in the Pembrokeshire area, but you may find some useful help here.

7. You don’t have to use a coffin

This is TRUE. You can use a shroud. In fact the Muslim community virtually always use shrouds and not coffins. If you’re going to be cremated you will also need a shroud board for the shrouded dead person to lie on as when they are ‘charged’ into the cremator. So, you need something with a solid base for the charger to push against.

8. You have to pay a fee to transport a body across a county line

This is FALSE. This used to be the case, and it is a myth that some older people still believe, but it’s now completely untrue. Obviously, if you’re using an funeral director, or driving your own car, there will be a bigger cost the further you travel because of the bigger mileage but not because you have to pay to cross into another county.

9. You pay a double/triple fee to bury someone if the cemetery is not in the area they live in

This is TRUE. This is due to lack of space and councils wishing to discourage burial. You can get round this as it can be based on where the person who died lived, or it can be based on whoever is signing the papers for the burial’s place of residence.

10. There are five places in the UK where you can be legally buried at sea

This is TRUE. Three in England – off the Isle of Wight, off Tynemouth, and in between Hastings and Newhaven. Two in Scotland – off Oban and John O’ Groats.

Anyone can be buried at sea, although it’s more complicated and more expensive than being buried on dry land. The navy carries out its own burials at sea for veterans who wish it. The person who is buried at sea must have an id tag attached to them, in case they drift. A special coffin is required for burial at sea – solid softwood, no plastic, lead, copper or zinc. There should be 200kg of weight attached to the bottom and holes drilled throughout to ensure it sinks. Francis Drake wore a suit of armour to be lowered into the sea in 1596, off the coast of Panama (he was dead, obviously!). If all this sounds a bit much, get cremated and have your ashes scattered at sea instead – no licence required just be mindful of the wind direction!

Read more – 10 Myths About Death & Funerals Part 1 

One of the biggest benefits of a celebrant-led funeral is their openness and inclusivity. They allow to you to have a ceremony that is a true reflection of your loved one, a bespoke ceremony that completely encapsulates their love, style, personality and interests. Anything is possible. It can have the content you want – which may be religious, humanist, secular or on a specific theme.

Celebrants are trained and experienced in creating and officiating personalised ceremonies.  We spend the time getting to know you, your family and the person who has passed away. We can share with you options for your funeral, and these aren’t always what you think!

So often families get channeled into the ’20 minutes at the crematorium’, or the ’20 minutes at the graveside’ formula. Now, for many families, this is right for them, but for an increasing number of families, there are so many other ways of saying goodbye to your loved one. You have far more options than you probably realise.

There is a growing funeral revolution.

Imagine having a ceremony in a woodland, a hotel, the beach, the gold club, pub, your own home? A ceremony that is not restricted by time constraints. A ceremony where the people present aren’t shuffling around, waiting to be ushered in, ushered out, everyone feeling the need to be solemn, quiet, mournful. A ceremony where your loved one can be present, there with you all. A ceremony in a place that feels right for you, them and your family. A ceremony that just flows and is all about the beautiful, meaningful life they had and shared with you all. A ceremony that truly represents their love, style, personality and interests.

I specilise in creating and officiating very unique, bespoke funerals. There are so many things that are possible. I will be blogging lots more on this topic, so do keep an eye! Please do contact me to find out more about the options and choices you have. You would be amazed at how much ownership you can take and how easy it is to move away from the more traditional idea of a funeral, to something that is indeed special, unique and totally fitting for the person you have lost.

LINK TO 10 MYTHS ABOUT DEATH – PART 1

LINK TO 10 MYTHS ABOUT DEATH – PART 2